Picture yourself at the ocean. If you have a specific spot that comes to mind, visualize it in detail. Imagine yourself sitting on a towel or the sand, looking out at the vast ocean. Notice the waves as the come in toward you, crashing or gently lapping at the shore, and then receding back out into the sea of blue. In and out. Notice how each in and out wave is unique, sometimes very gentle and slow, other times more chaotic and powerful. Isn’t it amazing how each wave is different, yet there’s a calming rhythm to the ocean?

The image of ocean waves flowing and changing with each cycle can help us better understand our emotions. When we experience an emotion, whether that’s joy, anger, sadness, embarrassment, disappointment, anxiety, etc., it can often feel like it’s overcome us. Sometimes, more painful emotions feel like they will last forever. Through the skill of “Riding the Wave,” however, we learn that emotions only last for a few minutes and naturally change with time. If we can allow ourselves to observe the emotion without trying to fight it or change it, it will quickly dissipate like an ocean wave being pulled back out to sea.

Instead of feeling overcome and powerless to your emotions, try this practice as a way to mindfully observe your emotional experience:

Bring awareness to the emotion. Take some time to name the emotion, noticing the nuance in your experience. For example, is it anger, or is it frustration, irritation, or even rage? Be gentle with yourself and try to take a non-judgmental stance toward the emotion.
Connect with the thoughts, urges, and body sensations associated with the emotion. If you’re experiencing anxiety, do you notice racing, worried thoughts, urges to avoid the situation or person, sweaty palms, a racing heart, or an uneasy stomach? As you get good at recognizing the signs and sounds of your emotions, you can more quickly respond to them.
Experience the emotion. Don’t try to stop the wave from coming toward you, don’t try to push away or avoid the emotion, and don’t try to control it. The goal here is to let yourself experience the waves flow in and out.
Remind yourself that this feeling is temporary. Keep observing and taking a curious stance toward your emotion as it changes and starts to dissipate.

A quote by Jon Kabat-Zinn gives us a playful way of viewing the practice of Riding the Wave:

“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”

References

Anderson, K. (2018). Riding the Wave of Emotions. Retrieved from

https://www.mindsoother.com/blog/riding-the-wave-of-emotions

Goldstein, E. (2009). Mondays Mindful Quote: Jon Kabat-Zinn. Retrieved from

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/mindfulness/2009/07/mondays-mindful-quote-jon-kabat-zinn/