Connecting With Loved Ones Virtually

Our need for connection is hardwired into us. Collaboration and cooperation was vital in helping early humans survive harsh environmental circumstances. While we may no longer need others to protect us from being eaten by a lion, we still crave interaction with others, as it keeps us mentally and emotionally healthy. Human connection allows us to grow and develop meaningful relationships. We are all probably feeling some of the disconnection that has occurred as we quarantine and practice social distancing, knowing that our typical way of being with others has changed. If you’re noticing feelings of loneliness setting in, be gentle with yourself. Consider trying out some of these creative suggestions for staying connected with others in a virtual format!

Book Club

Books give us so many opportunities to learn new things, reflect on important topics, and can spur lively discussion. Being part of a book club is a great way to have consistent contact with your loved ones, and talking about the book of the month gives a focus to your time together. Search online for book club question suggestions specific to the book you read, or use this list for inspiration: https://www.oprahmag.com/entertainment/a31047508/book-club-questions/

Virtual Dinner Parties

Choose a platform that works for you (zoom, FaceTime, Skype, etc.), pick a start time, and invite your loved ones to dinner! Some people may still be in their kitchen cooking, others might be sitting down to eat, but everyone will be connecting over food and conversation. 

Online Meditation and Mindfulness Practices

Sometimes it can be challenging to motivate ourselves to practice mindfulness and meditation on our own. We get busy with other tasks and it can feel challenging to set aside quiet time. By participating in a scheduled meditation, you might feel more connected and willing to prioritize this practice. The Christine Center in Willard, WI offers free online meditations Monday-Friday at 8:45am and 5:00pm: https://christinecenter.org/christine-center-online-daily-meditation/

Virtual Karaoke, Game Nights, and Playdates

Instead of thinking of all the things we can’t do in person right now, try shifting your mindset to ways in which we can still be social. Social events that typically happen at other people’s homes can be replicated through a virtual meetup. Try playing games like 20 questions, 2 Truths and a Lie, charades, and other interactive activities.

FaceTime Hang-outs:
+ cooking dinner together
+ take an online class together, YouTube or online studio (yoga, zumba, african dance workout, etc)
+ watch a movie/tv series together 
+ eat dinner together or meet-up for lunch
+ have coffee/tea date 

Outdoor Hang-outs:
+ meet up for a walk in the park/forest/trail
+ host a bonfire
+ parking lot meet up (stay in your warm car and chat with windows down)

When you notice yourself missing others or feeling lonely, try to schedule an opportunity to connect with loved ones, even if it’s through a phone or computer screen. 

References

https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/story/2020-03-19/coronavirus-tips-virtual-bookclub-game-night-dinner-party

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-nourishment/201612/why-we-need-each-other

Starting a New Habit

When you hear the word new, which emotions come up? Excitement, anxiety, hesitation, or even fear? New jobs, new experiences, and new opportunities force us into uncharted territory, which can be exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Many of us get comfortable in our routines, and the thought of switching things up or doing something we have no experience with brings up lots of worries and feelings of uncertainty. While there is nothing wrong with sticking to what we know and our usual routines, we might be missing out on growth opportunities if we don’t step into the unknown and push ourselves to try new things.

What is something you’ve always wanted to add to your life? Maybe it’s playing an instrument, biking to work, taking evening walks, practicing a sport, pursuing a hobby, etc. Starting new habits is definitely daunting, but what if your goal was simply to do the new task for 30 days? As Matt Cutts explains in his TedTalk, 30 days is just about the amount of time needed to add or subtract a habit. 

By challenging yourself to intentionally doing something for 30 days straight, you will probably notice two key changes. First, you will likely become more aware of the present moment as you bring your attention daily to this new task. Also, you will start to experience a sense of mastery. The more we do things that are challenging and new, the more we gain confidence and feel capable of accomplishing things we never thought we could. By starting a new habit and sticking with it, we feel empowered and proud of our accomplishment. 

If you’re feeling stuck in a rut and looking for a way to get energized, make a list of habits you’d like to add to your life. Pick one to start with, and challenge yourself to working on this habit a little bit each day, for 30 days. Let us know how it goes!

Making Time for Pleasant Activities

When life gets stressful, we can feel quite overwhelmed by the difficult situations we face. Maybe you’re weighed down by work demands that require constant attention. Maybe you’ve got a lot on your plate and are trying to juggle the needs of others and yourself without completely burning out. Or possibly you’re dealing with interpersonal conflict that weighs heavy on your heart and mind--say a difference of opinion or an argument that’s unsettling. 

When things don’t go your way, or you’re feeling stressed out, how do you tend to respond? It’s quite typical to become anxious, worried, and overwhelmed. Sometimes we think we can just “work a little harder” to resolve the stressors. We might jump into problem solving mode and add more expectations to ourselves, thinking this will help. In other situations, we may have urges to throw up our hands and give up, since the problem seems too big. Giving up can then lead us to feel disappointed in ourselves and prompt further sadness. Another option, which you may already be practicing, is making time for pleasant activities. Often, one of the best things we can do when dealing with a stressor is to take some time and space away from the situation. By engaging in something pleasant, we create distance from the stressor, tend to our self-care and mental health, and can usually return to the issue with a new perspective. 

Instead of viewing pleasant activities and events as things we can enjoy after we’ve tackled our work or responsibilities, think of them as vital pieces of our lives that deserve to be prioritized. Consider scheduling fun activities throughout the week, carving out longer windows of time on the weekends or as possible. Making sure pleasant events are part of your weekly routine will help reduce stress, boost mood, and help you feel more balanced and present. 

Ideas of Pleasant Activities

  • Go to the lake or a river

  • Pick up a pencil and paper and draw

  • Go for a bike ride

  • Stroll around your neighborhood

  • Try out a new recipe

  • Give a gift card or handwritten note to a friend

  • Do a puzzle

  • Take a walk in a park or on a trail

  • Spend time gardening or tending to an indoor plant

  • Play board games

  • Color a coloring page

  • Exercise and move your body

  • Find a new hobby

  • Book an appointment for acupuncture, massage, or reiki

  • Have a picnic

  • Do a house project or rearrange furniture

  • Reach out to an old friend

  • Stargaze at night

References

“Pleasant Activities to Do.” Retrieved from https://livingwell.org.au/well-being/mental-health/pleasant-things-to-do/