Managing Social Anxiety

How do we step back into a world after over a year of physical disconnection?

We’re starting to see businesses open their doors, employees have the opportunity to go back into the office after WFH, indoor dining is welcomed again, masks optional in some communities, social gatherings planned for summertime…

What’s ok… what’s not ok?

There can become a point at which anxiety makes people so uncomfortable when they are out of their ‘controlled’ (or safe) space — like what homes have been the last year. If you’re experiencing social anxiety, you may start to feel physically uncomfortable or sick, like something is crawling under your own skin. It’s easy to feel out-of-control as things start opening up — so much so that you would rather stay at home.

A socially anxious person may feel nervous, like they’re being judged or doing something judge-able. It’s important to stay grounded in knowing ourselves. Operate out of your values and allow grace, compassion, and forgiveness into your heart. What is your intention?

Ease into it:

Stepping back into the world can feel overwhelming. New boundaries may need to be imagined. If it is possible, remember that it is not required to grow quickly or all at once. If we go too quickly, it’s easy to feel rattled.

Talk about it:

Have a conversation with your loved ones and peers about your anxiety. Let them know you’re not ready — rather than feeling like you’re being pushed, ask for their support.

Practice visualizations:

Prepare yourself to re-enter the world by closing your eyes and mentally rehearsing the scenario.

What does the environment look like? How many people are going to be there? What’s it going to feel like? How can I communicate to the people I am with if I start to feel any discomfort?

Acknowledge your emotions:

Note what you’re experiencing. A lot has happened to us as individuals and as communities this year, so what feels right for you right now?

How is your breath? Are you uncomfortable? Stressed? Fearful? Angry? Scared? Panicked? Over-stimulated?

Small wins:

Safety should never be compromised, but a simple win could look like taking a walk with a friend who you haven’t seen in a while or try picking up your coffee curb-side from your favorite cafe. As more and more people become optimistic about having a ‘semi-normal’ summer again, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed with weekend plans starting to build up. If it is possible, try not to feel obligated to attend every social gathering if you’re not sure how you’re feeling. Keep checking in with yourself and re-evaluate your needs.

Contemplate:

How am I doing?

Do I need more time for myself to process?

Which emotions am I struggling with?

Am I intentionally exchanging comfortability, disconnection, and convenience over social anxiety?

Do I feel pressure from society?

Have I given myself the opportunity to establish my community over the last year? (community could look like your family, kids, work or gym friends, etc…)

What are some boundaries I can set for myself?

We will be rediscovering our community again. As we slowly integrate back into the world, let's do so mindfully. Not quicker, but more consciously. Consider yourself and what you need before shifting your social patterns.